Anyone who’s had a backpack strapped to their back for several months and lived like a pauper on the streets abroad, this article is for you. You know who you are: the sweaty, dirty, often exhausted, sunburned and hungry ones. The ones who try to live in each country like it’s their own, who take a bite of culture so large it’s sometimes hard to swallow. Who feel the change inside themselves with every country they enter, and feel a small part of their heart break with each country they leave.
How do we keep it up? When the pack comes off and the work clothes go back on, how do we keep the good things we’ve found and cultivated in ourselves alive?
How do you possibly explain to your friends and family the deep and permanent changes you have undergone?
How do you recreate the small gestures of kindness from people that moved you to tears, but cannot be put into words?
How do you explain how the poorest people you have ever met have the richest lives of anyone?
More importantly, how do we resist molding back into our old lives once we’re back “home”?
The cell phone and internet tethers, the status items: cars and homes, the retail therapy to fill voids in our soul, the expensive dinners to socialize with people we don’t love, and general superficiality.
Is it possible, or do you have to adjust to EVERY country you are in, including your own?
I know what I want. I want a simple life with a clean home, water I can drink, friends that are family, someone to love and trust, and eventually healthy and happy children. No more, no less.
I feel that coming back to America this would be looked at as “ambitionless”. I don’t want to live to work anymore. I want to work to support my life. I don’t want the job title, I want only the satisfaction of doing a good job for someone. I don’t want a car. I want to take the time to walk where I need to go, to be alone with my thoughts and myself. I don’t want a house full of expensive things that mean nothing to me. I want to be surrounded by photos of memories and the people I love. I don’t want to waste money on alcohol and gourmet foods, I want to save money to give to those who have less. I want to be the person I am abroad while I am home… but I don’t know how to keep this integrity to myself.
Travel friends, how do you do it? Do you find yourself compromising after time, or are you puritans? I’m curious to hear from everyone, really. Help a girl out.
'Walking the tightrope of “travel life” at home' have 12 comments
September 22, 2010 @ 10:05 pm Ashley
Wait wait – you DON’T want to waste money on alcohol??
Coulda fooled me :p
September 22, 2010 @ 10:05 pm Steve Kramer
Hmmmm … Yeah. I really wish I had the great guru-like response to your plea. How do you stay in the moment when all about you are whining about what happened and fretting about what might happen?
How do you maintain honest generosity when your awash in a world of users and takers?
Turn off all the electro-leashes! Kill your TV! That just brings them running to your door asking, “Are you alright?”
“Yeah. I just want a bit of silence! Do you have any idea what “silence” is?”
No, Brandy, they don’t.
Remember, silence is as important as the note when making music.
September 22, 2010 @ 11:46 pm Mom
Well Miss Brandy, having never come close to your traveling experiences, I cannot comment on your post from that point of view, but I can tell you that choosing a relatively “simple” life when compared to all those around you, you will be sometimes judged as lazy, ambitionless, a simpleton or in it’s extreme “a waste of space”(and yes, I have heard them all). Holding on to your convictions and integrity is something that I believe ebbs and flows. You will lose your way at times, but you will remember the way back. I think that, yes, maybe you have to adapt, even in your own country, to some extent, in order to function here. The important stuff though… the heart stuff …I know you will find “your” way of holding on to those changes and sharing them with us, if…… we are observant enough to see and open enough to receive. It makes me happy that you care.
September 23, 2010 @ 3:41 am Teresa
Brandy, perhaps the hard part of living in the richest country is to work to appreciate all you have–clean water, a roof over your head, food to eat and the means to obtain it all. Travel does help us to appreciate it–we see others struggle and if we can’t put ourselves in their shoes (or lack of shoes) we are pretty miserable humans. Your advantages are that you have traveled, you have given careful thought to what you have seen and experienced and you have the opportunity to come back to the Central Coast where, in my humble opinion, people have a greater appreciation for what is important than in other places I have lived. And, if you have children, as you wish to do, you’ll pass that “wealth” along to them–a much more important inheritance than money itself. Cheers to you!
September 23, 2010 @ 4:01 am adam
first of all, are you back at home? i thought you were in panama?
secondly, i can completely relate and i am not even home yet! this particularly resonates with me: “How do you possibly explain to your friends and family the deep and permanent changes you have undergone?”
just talking with some friends and family while i’m abroad, i already have a hard time dealing with this. i know i’ve changed (and for the better) but i don’t want to sound like a douche-hippie-freak when talking with those that i feel don’t understand me anymore. it’s tough.
September 23, 2010 @ 7:01 am Keith
I don’t know if anyone has the answers, but I think the questions themselves might be answers in themselves.
September 23, 2010 @ 8:11 am Heather
Maybe you are home to help those of us that have traveled and experienced similar life changing moments but have lost ourselves in the day-to-day shuffle of American life. Maybe you were meant to remind us that we can survive in a simpler world and need less then we have and that it is ok to slow down and enjoy the people in our lives. Sometimes we all need a gentle reminder to be thankful for what we do have and it is ok to not keep up with the Joneses. Love you!
October 7, 2010 @ 9:09 am livevicuriously
hey, I love you woman 🙂
September 24, 2010 @ 11:33 pm onetravel
Hi,
This is a wonderful blog! It was a very good read.
I was wondering if you would be interested in guest blogging on my blog. It is a collection of my travels and the travels of my guests. If you scan the site you can see that now almost 100% of the posts are from guests. Lately I’ve been finding many people interested in guest posting.
Included in your post will be a link to your website using whatever anchor text or key words you wish and a description of your site (if you choose to include one.)
The blog (OnetravelBloggers.com) contains hundreds of great stories from travelers who love to share their journey with the world…
So if you are interested in being a guest, please let me know.
Send me an Email:
gchristodoulou(-at-)OneTravel(-dot-)com
September 27, 2010 @ 7:27 am Debi
You can create anything you want.
(Is there ANYTHING in your experience that proves that statement incorrect?)
UBU, k? And BB9, 2, if you can. (Don’t hurt… yourself or others.)
And, try not to worry about what anybody else may/may not think.
Create YOUR OWN reality. Share it with other like-minds.
This is The Good Life, imho.
(Good questions!)
October 18, 2010 @ 8:55 pm Aldo
Hey, I work with the CheapOair travel blog (cheapoair.typepad.com) and we’re interested in having you guest blog for us. Please contact me if you’re interested. Thanks! Aldo.
October 28, 2010 @ 7:07 pm livevicuriously
Aldo, that sounds great! I’ve recently used CheapO Air and would be happy to promote you!