Today is exactly two months before I leave on a journey like I have never embarked on before. It’s January 3rd 2010 and I have given my notice at my awesome job, at my beautiful rental, and have begun to sell all my worldly possessions. I placed an ad on craigslist and sure enough, people started showing up, and taking away my things in exchange for cold hard cash. GREAT!
Except, it made me feel terribly dirty inside- like I was selling a piece of myself.
I couldn’t figure out what on earth was wrong with me, I need more money for to save up for this epic, round-the-world trip, and it’s being handed over to me– that is everything I needed.
Then it dawned on me: I am associating who I am with these things. Flowers, desks, paintings, all generic items from Pier 1, Target, and other home stores that anyone could buy anywhere, and yet, I felt like it was mine, a part of me. I never imagined I would be that way, and it disturbed me more than I can explain to you.
It now appears a part of my journey will be to discover my identity separate of my belongings.
Imagine no television, no multiple pairs of shoes, no walk in closet chock full of clothing, no pretty paintings, none of it. Terrifying, isn’t it? Who are we without our things by our side? Who am I without my walls plastered with family photos, carpets under my feet, shiny, pretty things that I love? We will find out!
Living with wants vs needs and identifying the difference between those two is a very exciting part of this journey for me.
I look forward to testing my limits of sufficiency and understanding what I am outside of what I own.
I will share what I learn with you, and I promise to always be honest, because not every step of this journey can be beautiful, but as they say “travel is glamorous only in retrospect”.
To travel, a new year, new experiences, new friends, and being content with what I have.
What more could I possibly need in life?
'Separating Myself From My Things; I thought it’d be easier' have 6 comments
January 3, 2010 @ 6:50 pm Abbie
What an amazing realization… good luck on your journey!
January 3, 2010 @ 6:57 pm Nomadic Chick
The one thing I always noticed during my short spurts of traveling is everything around me changes: hostels, people, languages, transportation. The ONE aspect that remains consistent is ME. I am constant the minute I wake to the moment I close my eyes. You might discover this too. Good luck on this adventure!
January 3, 2010 @ 10:19 pm livevicuriously
Exactly- and though the circumstances around you might change you, you still have to answer to yourself. I suppose that means the best thing about traveling, is how we fit into our new homes- be it for one night, or forever.
January 3, 2010 @ 7:00 pm Paula Swenson
I’ve done it several times and although it does get easier, it is always challenging– but the incredible lightness that follows will amaze you!
January 3, 2010 @ 10:18 pm livevicuriously
Paula, you are such an amazing human being. You and Steve are more inspiring than you can ever imagine. all my love and best wishes to you.
January 3, 2010 @ 7:08 pm Vi
Have a great and safe journey! I hope you find what you need. =]